What the Fuck?: Jennifer Garner as Miss Marple

Here, read this.  What the fuck, right?  How in the hell am I supposed to get over this?  Miss Marple is an old woman.  That's the whole premise.  The entire premise.  She's an old woman who uses that fact to gain leverage over unwitting criminals who underestimate her abilities due to her age.  You can't change the fundamental reason for her existence as a creation.  Way to go Disney, this is a pure dick move.  There are plenty of actresses old enough to play this role.  I mean, I'd take mid-50's.  Why even call it Miss Marple?  Who would they be making this for?  People who are into Jennifer Garner and people who enjoy Miss Marple have got to be fairly mutually exclusive.  How about you just make a mystery show about a soccer mom with a mannish frame?  You know who would be perfect for that?  Well, Sigourney Weaver, but if she doesn't want it how about Jennifer Garner?  Let's do it, somebody get Ben Affleck to green light it. This is what Miss Marple looks like.

If she were still alive, I bet Agatha Christie would go on one of her eleven day disappearing benders.  And Jennifer Garner might end up poisoned.